Dear Girl Mom, She’s Watching: Teaching Our Daughters Not to Hate Their Bodies

by | Apr 11, 2023 | Body Image, Helping Daughter with Body Image, Motherhood

This is a letter I’m writing to you, but also to myself. You see moms, our daughters are watching (so are our sons). But we have to not just teach them how not to hate their bodies, we have to show them. The job is a big one. But, our girls are watching. 

Dear Girl Mom:

She’s watching.

Every scowling glare we give the mirror. Every time we use the “F” word (fat). Each and every time we grumble about thighs that touch or bellies that aren’t flat as the pavement.

She knows.

She knows when we aren’t happy with our appearance and when those thoughts consume us. She knows when mommy’s confident smile turns into an insecure grimace. She knows when the clock says it’s time to leave and mom is trying on outfit number forty-seven.

But, she loves.

She loves you despite the fact that you look nothing like one of those ladies on the magazine cover or Netflix. She loves your hair, just like it is unkempt, first thing in the morning. She loves clinging to your leg for security, even on days when you are wearing jeans that barely zipped.

Mom, you are enough because you are her mom.

Jesus’ sacrifice makes you enough, not your dress size. Not how your thighs look in a swimsuit. He already accepts you.

And, the truth is, so does she.

When you question your value, she also questions hers.

When you doubt that you are good enough, guess who wonders the same?

Mom, find your security in Him. Believe that what you have to offer is so much more than what you look like on the outside.

Then show her.

Show her that women aren’t required to hate their bodies.

Show her that women don’t have to restrict food, over-exercise, buy all the things to prove they are enough.

Demonstrate to this little girl God has given you that you truly believe your worth and value are found in Jesus Christ.

Please, mom, do not expect her to believe this if you don’t. How can she learn what she does not see.

But, show her that women come in all shapes, sizes, colors, and personalities. Tell her that it’s okay to be exactly as God made her. Remind her that God has a unique purpose for her life and that He has given her everything she needs, physically, to fulfill his purpose.

Can you believe this for yourself?

Can you believe that God has more to say about your value and your worth than the scale, mirror, or your jeans’ size?

Learn it for you and then show her.

Show her so she knows. Show her so that she will also believe.

Rest in this truth today and share with friends who also struggle.

Do you need more help improving your body image so that you can help your daughter? Heather does one-on-one body image coaching. Learn more about how you can do Christian body image coaching with author and podcast host, Heather Creekmore.

Teaching our daughters not to hate their bodies requires us to show them more than we teach them. Our show speaks louder than our tell.

2 Comments

  1. Erika Hartzell

    I love this. Great perspective. Just this week, my 4yo daughter told me so sincerely how beautiful I looked in my bathing suit. It struck me and caused me to reflect on my value and her perfect admiration of mommy. I want to be so careful to love and accept myself and convey those messages to her.

    Reply
    • Heather Creekmore

      Awww… I love that story, Erika. Thank you for sharing it. Yes, they are watching. They don’t see the “imperfections” they see someone they love. 😉 Thanks for chiming in!

      Reply

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